Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Randomize
