I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
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