I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
Randomize
