Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
this boner is exhausting
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
