the new apple iphone has a feature that can find itself if you lose it, apple is getting closer to making a phone completely drunkproof...
The best revenge is premature balding
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize