is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
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