NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
Randomize
