things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize