Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
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