It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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