Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
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