Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize