Come home. Im drunk and cutting my own hair. This is bad, i need you.
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
Dicks are not precious.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
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