Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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