The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
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