He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
i forgot i changed ur name in my phone to "the situation" so when u texted me i got really excited for a hot second
i thought we decided on me being "the altercation" instead
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
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