CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
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