so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize
