Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
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We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
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My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
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