piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
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