Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
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