Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
Randomize
