Im at strip club and am horny
I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
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