Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
