Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
