sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
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I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
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I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
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LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed