all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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