Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Randomize
