Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
Randomize
