are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
Randomize
