you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
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