You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
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