I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
Randomize
