I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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