ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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