carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
Randomize
