How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
Randomize
