So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
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