apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
Randomize
