Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
I took your shirt off for you after you threw up on yourself, read you the ugly duckling, and then tucked you in. you better fucking love me, jackass.
You filled up my voicemail with a slurred but graphic depiction of how you were humping a fire hydrant.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
