ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
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