oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
Randomize
