You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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