I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
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