i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Randomize