There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
She came home wasted 'not wantin to talk about it' so for revenge I woke her up with a dutch oven and she puked all over me and the bed. I can't win.
Dude I told you 22 year olds shouldn't get married
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
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