cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
My balls are so social today.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
Randomize
