She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
Randomize