it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize
