If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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